Winds of Change

Since my visits to the doctors and phlebotomists, and being told I have PCOS I have felt a bit scattered. I have found that people have been either breathtakingly kind (thanks Tash, Angela, Annastasia, Anna…) but also breathtakingly thoughtless. I had an email from someone at work who really should have known better, that left me speechless with anger. I had sent an email to them explaining that I now knew for certain that I was not pregnant, but I did have PCOS, that it would not involve surgery, but I might be a bit…fragile…while I got used to it all. The response was oh, glad it is not a big deal, by the way, did you want it to be a baby? Reading it in type like that it seems like a silly thing to be angry over. But you know, it IS a big deal to me. And what do you want me to say? That I had just got used to the idea that I was pregnant, and then found out that I wasn’t? That I had worked out when I would be showing, when I would be due? How I would tell my family?

I think things like that are too raw to share in an email like that. I think I am going to have to be a bit less sensitive too. The good thing is that I serenely clicked on 'delete' and kept all these thoughts to myself. It really does feel good to share them here though!